Thursday, February 3, 2011

Why can't today be Friday?

I thought that if I treated the whole day as if it was Friday, then it would actually come true and then I would be given this magically unnamed day to just sit around the house and enjoy the warmth while I relax in pajamas. But I don't think it worked very well.
This morning when I woke up, I actually convinced myself it was Friday so I would get up and go to the gym. When I was driving to the gym, I kept ignoring that I knew it was Thursday, but kept saying what a great Friday it was. At the gym, I laughed at any news stations talking about the weather that would come in tomorrow (Friday) and continued working on my arms. (By the way, I almost threw up from my workout this morning and I am super proud because that means I was pumping the iron hard. Haven't gotten that good of a workout in months!)
When I got ready for work at the gym, that's when I started losing my dream that today is Friday. Not because it is in fact, Thursday, but because it can't be Friday...
Let me explain. I would love tomorrow to be a 'Snow Day', it would be fantastic. I would still wake up early, but that would just mean that I would get to work from home and be in my pajamas. I don't want to drive anywhere in the snow. I want to sit on the couch and watch Disney Movies while I get my long list of work taken care of. But if I have to wake up and go to work tomorrow, then that means I have to go work out before work tomorrow. And if I have to go work out tomorrow morning, then that means I have to be in bed at 9pm tonight, and that is the truth behind it all. I am so tired of going to bed at 9.
When I was a kid, I thought "When I grow up, I am going to stay up as late as I want and do whatever I want!" But that isn't true. You don't get to do whatever you want, if you want to own whatever you want. So that means I have to go to bed at a reasonable hour and yes that means I have to go to bed at 9. It makes me sad, but my activities are based on how long it should take and what I am allowed to do before 9. Going out with friends to Happy Hour is no more and even though it makes me happy, there are times where I miss the socialization.
But it's just part of getting older. I am going to 2 parties this weekend, and I have mentally prepared myself to not drink at all so I won't be tempted to want to smoke. I know my friends will all assume that I am pregnant, and of course I am not, but just trying to be responsible. It is the best thing for me right now to focus on being as healthy as I can be.
So going to bed at 9 and not drinking or smoking is really where I need to be at right now. Working out in the morning at 6 is how I live my life at the moment, and even though the 8 year old me would try to convince myself to not go into work tomorrow to work from home and stay up all night with my friends, the me that wants to do whatever I want will choose the early bedtime and a glass of fruit juice.

No comments:

Post a Comment